About a week ago, I had this overwhelming feeling to take a break from Facebook. I’ve been actively using it everyday – minus a vacation here or there – since it opened up to the public (beyond college students). So, I waved my metaphorical goodbye and told my friends that if they wanted to reach me, they could find me on email or phone.
I wanted a break for two reasons:
1) I was feeling glum, depressed, lousy, whatever word you want to use for shitty, and was concerned I’d start voicing that online. Not a good idea!
2) All of the holidays photos of friends and their husbands/wives and kids were annoying me. My friends and their husbands/wives and their kids were not annoying me, but the happy, smiling faces were annoying me.
They were reminding me spending the holidays and my birthday – yet again – alone. See, I wasn’t bothered by being alone this year. In fact, I was bothered by the fact that I wasn’t bothered by being alone anymore. I was numb to it and had officially realized that this was my life.
I was alone. I bought a house alone. I was planning my birthday alone (with good friends, but no spouse). I wasn’t cooking and no one was cooking for me.
And I was used to it. I realized: I’m 39, single, and the reality is – this is my life.
So what does this have to do with Facebook, you ask?
Facebook is a constant reminder of life, couples, relationships, going out, doing, going, being, living, doing, being here, travel, etc.
I needed a break to take in what I had discovered.
I was alone and this was my reality. And I needed to get to my inner peace with it.
I’m not there yet. Know why?
Because I haven’t given up hope on finding someone to share my life with. So there, Facebook.
I still haven’t gone back on it yet. I don’t really miss it. Eventually I’ll return.