Curves

It’s finally #thecurvycon!

The Curvy Con is a 2-day fashion show, body positive conference, and shopping extravaganza. Hundreds of women & men (maybe?) gather during NYFW to express power to our curves. Of course, I’m going to be losing weight post-surgery but no doubt I’ll be curvy. I’ve been curvy even when thin!

I’ll be blogging during the con and will post videos & pix too!

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Day Off

Wow, I really needed today! Our offices were closed so I had time to catch up on things. I got my car inspected and detailed (it’s glistening!). I also went to the gym and met with the head trainer. He’s definitely a kindred spirit. Very smart and patient so he will be a good workout partner.

My bags are packed and in the morning, Mr T & I leave for our adventure in VT. We have dinner reservations at my fave restaurant there, and I’m even squeezing in a massage on Sunday. We have access to a nice spa with our hotel reservation, so I look forward to R&R along with our hike at Emerald Lake. Boots are packed!

In the meanwhile I’m also planning my trip to NYC for CurvyCon! Should be a very fun experience.

I also managed to schedule about 5 donor visits in 2 days next week!

Today was another good day.

Mom is hanging in. She’s been getting IV drips to hydrate her in between chemo visits so I think that helps. But she’s very tired. I seem to catch her when she’s in bed, resting. She keeps herself entertained with “Madame Secretary” on her iPad on Netflix. She’s been sleeping through her visitors. But she gets a full report from Dad. And their lovely friends bring them dinner almost every night. It’s wonderful. Today mom had challah with melted Munster cheese for dinner. Sounds good to me! One day at a time for mom.

 

October 22

I found out today that my surgery is likely going to be on October 22, as I requested. It’s after my big work event on October 8 and my family birthday party on October 20. Mom’s chemo runs through December so the hope is by Thanksgiving, I can at least travel by car if need be. I did my part in working it around work & family – two things I ❤️!

When I found out the date, a huge emotional wave came across me. It wasn’t nerves or stress. To the contrary, it was pure excitement. The thought of feeling better – be it with my knees or sleep or stomach – was nearly overwhelming to process.

Don’t get me wrong – as I consumed a large glass of delicious Brunello last night, I realized it was one of the last drinks I will have in at least a year. But when I think about sacrificing wine for health, there is no question what outweighs the other.

Mom is doing ok these days. She’s now had 3 rounds of chemo – out of 18 – and she’s eating a bit more as her nausea is subsiding a bit. I bought her some new clothes today for my next visit to her, in about a week and a half. Between now and then, Mr T & I are heading to one of my childhood haunts – Manchester, VT – this weekend, and then I’m off to the Big Apple for CurvyCon!

So, it’s a good day.

PS Thank you to those of you who reach out after reading my posts. I’m not always great at getting right back to you, but trust me when I say your outreach is invaluable.

BC/AC

I told my dad I feel like our lives are divided: BC (before cancer) and AC (after cancer). He totally got it.

Today is mom’s first round of chemo. As luck would have it, I am here in NJ so I’ll be able to accompany her. It takes 3 hours – she said, “You don’t have to sit with me,” but I’ll bring my laptop and work from the hospital. It isn’t like I haven’t done it before. Again, grateful to my amazing boss and job that I have this flexibility.

This was today’s FB post:

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Sharing it here in case you missed it. Mom is barely eating – she is enjoying protein shakes, eggs, and a few other favorite foods. But I doubt she is even consuming 500 calories a day. But Dad is enjoying the food deliveries, although he said he has lost 10 pounds too (which delights him).

Speaking of weight loss, dad and I had a big heart-to-heart on Saturday night about my bariatric surgery, which is still full steam ahead. He and mom said they want me to hire someone to help me post-surgery since they can’t be there to help me. I said I would consider it but I’m not really sure what help I’ll need. Maybe laundry – but my cleaners do it for me – and errands – Amazon, anyone? I have Mr T, Ken, and Marina, and some friends who can help, so we’ll see if it is needed. I’m hoping to have the surgery towards the end of October, after my 2 big work events. #priorities

More later about the chemo.

So, it’s 10:22 pm. Chemo day #1 went very smoothly!

We arrived at the doctor’s office at 12:45, and mom’s chemo went from about 1:30-5:30pm. It was an extended day but it should run about 3 hours now on Mondays.

I worked through most of the chemo as mom & dad chatted with the nurses and other patients. Of course, they knew other people getting treatment. Small town.

Mom had energy and more of an appetite tonight. Amazing what some drugs can do! I ran out and got her pills, more snacks, etc. We all settled into College Jeopardy. I killed it tonight. I’m seriously the smartest 43 year old college student. Ok, I’m obviously kidding but it’s always nice to win in fake Jeopardy.

We then watched the most painful show to watch – it’s called “escape to the continent” or something like that. Brits go to their favorite places in Europe, look at tons of homes, and never end up purchasing one! So frustrating. Bring on House Hunters International – in 30 minutes, they’ve sold all of their earthy possessions, looked at tons of houses, rented one, and moved in. Yes, all in 30 minutes. Bring me that instant gratification, please and thank you.

But I digress.

Mom did great today.

I’m off tomorrow for a work event in NYC. Ciao!

#2018

woman-girl-freedom-happy-39853.jpegI haven’t written in ages. Here’s the life update in hashtags:

  1. I have a new job that I really, really like! #enoughsaid
  2. I turned 43 years old a few weeks ago. #yikes
  3. It’s now 2018. My resolution: drink more H20. #snazzynewwaterbottle
  4. I am still sans boyfriend, but I don’t really care very much because my life is pretty fulfilling. #singlesassy
  5. I have a fantastic vacation on the books for December 2018 which includes a trip to Spain, Portugal, and the Canary Islands. #singlescruise
  6. I finally was diagnosed with sleep apnea and I am working on getting used to a CPAP. When I use it, I feel way more rested so I am incredibly motivated to make that happen. #sleepisgood
  7. I’ve started to care less about what other people think of me. In the words of Alec Baldwin impersonating Donald Trump on SNL: #huuuuuggggge
  8. I’ve taken significant social media breaks. #cathartic
  9. I am not currently living paycheck-to-paycheck. I am saving money. #incrediblemilestone
  10. I really need to visit Rome again. #romeishome

Patterns

Have you ever taken the time to look for patterns in your life? You know what I mean. We all do things by habitually and the reality is, sometimes you don’t notice the patterns unless you write about them on a blog. When I’ve gone back and looked at posts from SingleSassy.com, my old dating blog, I’ve noticed a downward spiral in my mood sometime in early January each year. This is definitely due to the weather, the lack of natural sunlight, the depreciation of vitamin D, and anything else that is negatively related to the New England winter. Because I’ve noticed these trends, I’ve worked really hard to try to battle some of these challenges that I face year after year. 

A few years ago, I went to visit my parents in March, who were staying in Florida, and I was ready to pack my bags and move there after a few days of sun and relaxation. But a few hours after I landed back in Boston, I called my mom and said that I did not want to leave my home. As much as I enjoyed being in the sun, I didn’t want to leave my life back in Boston. But it was good for me to have a short break and to get some sunshine. This winter and spring are very busy at work. Unfortunately, because of the timing of our annual gala, I am not able to go visit my parents in Florida. So this afternoon, after spending a significant amount of time looking for good prices, I booked an excursion to the happiest place on earth…for me… Rome, Italy!

Listen, I got an amazing deal, but it isn’t as if I’m rolling in the dough. I rationalized booking this trip as an investment in my mental health. I think I may have written in an earlier post that I said to a few people in the last six months, that I truly believe that if I keep going the way I am in my life that I will die young from a heart attack or stress. I don’t want that to happen. So I am really trying to be more mindful and take care of myself. I’ve chosen a line of work that doesn’t allow for any moment of pause or relaxation when you’re in the throes of it, so it’s up to me to carve out time where I can focus on the things that I love. And for me, since 1996, the one thing that gives me absolute joy is spending time in Rome. Throw in a Caravaggio painting or sculpture by Bernini, and I’m in heaven.

But, really, it doesn’t matter what I’m doing. I can be sitting on the stoop in a random Piazza. Or, I can grab a piece of pizza at a local Italian bar. Or, I can be sipping espresso while watching people walk by. It doesn’t really matter. The pure joy of being in Rome is enough.

When I was in Rome earlier this year, I felt no depression or anxiety. I just walked and walked and walked throughout the city, and enjoyed every moment.

Is it April yet?

Photos from Europe, September 2016

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Espresso and Croissant at Paris Airport
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View from Barcelona apartment
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Positano, Italy
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Shoemaker in Sorrento, Italy
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Amalfi Coast, Italy
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Jimmy Choo window display in Rome
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Henri Matisse painted from the balcony above in Nice.
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View from Casa Batllo, Gaudi in Barcelona